Category Archives: Personal

A Simple Way To Discover Your Passion

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As most of you know, I entered both of my blogs (The Romantic Vineyard) in the Ultimate Blog Challenge. I was crazy to think I could keep up with it, especially since we were away for two weeks smack in the middle of April. But I did manage 22 posts on this blog! 22!!! That’s quite a feat when you consider I’ve only had a total of 45 posts since August of last year. I’ve doubled in a month what has taken me 7 months to write previously. I also posted 26 on TRV for a total of 48 posts in one month. So I’m extremely happy. 🙂

But what I’m happiest about is those who have joined my author blog as a result. I feel as though I’ve received an Oscar and I have a list of thank you’s:

  • Thank you for stopping by.
  • Thank you for signing up to receive my posts via e-mail.
  • Thank you for buying and reading my book.
  • Thank you for caring to learn more about your own family history.
  • And thank you for helping me find my author blog voice and direction, a new experience for me.

Through it all I’ve discovered a new passion I didn’t realize had been born in my heart. It’s to help others discover the stories in their family history and to share what they’ve learned with me and their extended family.

I’ve heard it said that if you want to know what you’re passionate about, ask your children.

Would what they perceive match your answer? One dad I know said his children answered, “You’re cholesterol.” Ha! He didn’t realize how often he read the labels on everything he ate, and how much he talked about how high his levels were. I don’t think he would have ever said he was passionate about it, but he was. Anything that receives our daily attention is most likely an indicator of a passion. Simply put…we do the things we want to do and tend to put off the things we don’t.

This leads me to my next question for you to ask an older member of your family–or to answer and share with your own grandchildren.

Question #22

What are you most passionate about now? How about when you were younger? Has it changed? If so, why?

Letting Go Of Temporary Blessings

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Mom's house

Today my Mom’s house will be sold to a new family. Since she died in December this was the first priority on our list. It is good that we were able to sell it so quickly, but I’m sad. She bought this house after my dad died so she could be closer to us. She was only there a few short years, but it served its purpose during that time.

Mom loved her backyard. She enjoyed watching the birds and squirrels from her bedroom window as they fluttered and scampered about the yard.

She loved when we would come to visit. I wish I could visit her one more time. But I can’t for that season is now part of my history. A story to be told to my grandchildren and their children. My oldest grandchildren will remember her, but the youngest ones won’t. It will be necessary to keep her memory alive by the stories we share about her.

My own children never met my grandmother, Grace. But they feel like they knew her because I’ve talked about her so much.

I’ve heard it said that four generations after  you will most likely know nothing about your life and loves. Really?! After living a long, productive life only 80 years after your death and no one will even remember? That seems so futile.

But is it really?

I don’t believe it is, because God has said He ordained every day planned for us before one of them came to pass. If He took care to plan each day, then even though others may not remember them, He certainly will. It’s important for us to live our lives in a way that matters for eternity, not wasting our time on temporary things. My Mom spent her life on things that mattered. She enjoyed the temporary blessings like houses and such, but she didn’t build her life around them. She prayed for her family every day. She listened to those in need and did whatever was in her power to help. She didn’t waste her time in self-pity, but she sought to better her life by constantly learning and growing. And she did this until her dying day.

I’m sorry this post has turned into a bit of a ramble, but that’s about all I have to give today. I’m sad, and I needed to express it by writing my thoughts and sharing them here.

Do you know the story of your great-great-great grandparents? If so, won’t you share a bit with me? It would sure encourage me on this day when I’m letting go of something, a temporary blessing, that once held a special place in my heart. 

Touchstones of the Heart

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You've got mail bookstore

Touchstones are the parts of movies, books or songs that strike a chord in our lives to which we can relate. This is why we have favorites.

My favorite movie is You’ve Got Mail because I can relate to Kathleen Kelly in so many ways.

  • She has a little bookstore where the people have shopped for years. They loved her mother and the way she entered into the lives of her customers. (My parents had a drug store where they entered into the lives of their customers with compassion and care.)
  • She love books and writing. (I love books and writing!)
  • She was fascinated by the ability to connect with people on the internet she had never met in person. (I marvel at this as well.)

These are just a few of my favorite parts. 🙂

This leads to my next question…

Question #20 – What books, movies or songs provide touchstones to your life? What are the connections?

Be Careful What You Wish For

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The weather is quite volatile today. As I’m typing the wind is howling through a cracked window; it sounds like an effect in a scary movie.

It got me to thinking of the storms I’ve experienced in my life. Back in 2004 when Hurricane Charley plowed across the entire state, I happened to be at a conference in Maryland and missed the whole storm. When I got home I was shocked to see the damage it had inflicted on our neighborhood. Tom rallied with neighbors to help clear the roads. But what’s funny is my reaction to the whole thing.

The last big hurricane to hit our area was in 1960 when Hurricane Donna hit Cuba and then made a bee line north damaging much of Florida. I was only one, but I remember bits and pieces of the storm because of its impact on our neighborhood.

I am a native from Orlando so whenever something big happens I want to experience it too. When I missed Charley I felt a strange since of disappointment. Two weeks later I was able to experience what I’d missed – Hurricane Fran hit Orlando, only to be followed by Ivan and Jeanne in two week increments! I finally said, “Enough already!”

Tom jokingly says that I got my wish! Yeah, I sure did! I felt bad for even expressing a desire to go through a hurricane. This must have been how the Israelites felt when God granted their wish for meat. They had so much quail it made them sick! We must be careful what we wish for.

This leads to my next question:

Question #19 – What severe storms have you experienced? How did it impact where you lived?

Exit 8

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We’re on the road headed to NC for a two-week vacation. Our daughter and her family (who lives in another state) is also on vacation this week. We happened to be texting when we realized we were both coming to Hardeeville, SC, at the same time.

So…we made plans to meet at the McDonalds without telling the kids. Believe it or not we arrived within 5 minutes of each other, and it was totally unplanned.

The look on the kids’ faces was so worth it!! There’s nothing like the surprise greetings from children. Their hugs are tighter and their smiles so genuine.

I’m enjoying the afterglow of the brief time we had. I saw Stella’s three new teeth, Norah’s new kitty, Bradley’s sweet smile and Mommy and Daddy’s new wheels. It was a fun, memorable pit stop.

Question #12 – When was a time you remember surprising someone or being surprised yourself?

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Children Are A Gift From God

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Photo Credit: Denise Janz Photography

Do you believe this truth from the Bible?

I certainly do. And I know my family has had a rich heritage of welcoming babies into this world. Some babies left this world way too soon dying from infant illnesses back in the early 1900’s. But many more lived long and fruitful lives.

This brings us to today’s Question #7:

How many brothers and sisters did your grandparents and/or parents have?

I have wonderful news! Our family is growing…we found out on Friday that our son and his wife, who are expecting in September, are having a son! Our son is having a son, and the Walter name will live on! We are doing the happy dance around here, and thank God for this unexpected gift. You see they have two beautiful daughters, and we expected a third for some reason. But after a sonogram where the little guy was showing off his stuff, there is no doubt that Bristol and Willow will soon have a baby brother to love and hold. 🙂

When was the last time you received an unexpected blessing?

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This is post #7 in the challenge to post everyday in April.

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Scents of Life

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Driving down the road the other day I caught the scent of orange blossoms in the air, and immediately my mind went to another time and place.  I was running through the groves at my grandmother’s home in Clermont hoping to avoid being hit by my brother’s usually perfect aim, with rotten oranges!  While many of you grew up enjoying snowball fights, I was caught in a messier version where the same rules applied.  Unfortunately, I was almost always on the losing team.  What triggered those memories was nothing more than the sweet smell of orange blossoms.

Florida State Flower

Florida State Flower

As I child, I loved coming into the house for dinner and smelling my mother’s wonderful cooking.  Somehow I didn’t realize then just how much thought and time went into her preparations each evening.  All I knew was that I loved the result. Unless, of course, she was fixing something I didn’t like!

How often are our thoughts affected by the smells we encounter during the day?  For example, where does your mind go when you smell hot, buttered popcorn, chicken frying, or roses in bloom?  I’m sure you have your own list of favorite scents.  Remember the smell of mimeograph copies?  (Those of you under the age of 30 probably won’t know what I’m talking about!) Nothing evokes the memories of life at my elementary school than this.

With spring in the air fresh scents abound.  I hope you will be able to get outside to enjoy God’s creation as it comes back to life from such a long, cold winter.  Me? I’m going to work on greeting my husband tonight with some delicious smells from the kitchen.  That’s the best aromatherapy you can’t buy in a bottle!

What are the scents of your life? What memories do they evoke?

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Joy In Heaven

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Mom's 90th birthday party last year. L. to R.: Me, Mom, Bill (my brother), Bettie at top (my sister)

Mom’s 90th birthday party last year. L. to R.: Me, Mom, Bill (my brother), Bettie at top (my sister)

My last post talked about Grace’s birthday which was March 2, 1889.

I want to share another birthday with you–my Mom’s, who would have been 91 today. She passed away 3 months ago, but it feels like only yesterday. I guess you’re never prepared to say good-bye to your mom. After all she is the one person who has known you literally from birth. If it wasn’t for her willingness to go through the pain of pregnancy and delivery, I wouldn’t be here.

So much has happened in the past three months:

  • We cleaned out her home, put it on the market and got a contract the first week. We’ll close before the end of March.
  • My niece found out she is expecting her 3rd baby in July, which is Mom’s 11th great-grandchild.
  • My son and daughter-in-love found out they are expecting their 3rd baby in September, which will be our 6th grandchild and Mom’s 12th great-grandchild.
  • My book is doing well, receiving 5 star reviews along with great encouragement for me to write the sequel.

I could go on, but you get the idea. Life continues when someone dies. Only those who are mourning actually slow down to ponder the loss. We do well to ponder in such times.

My heart is heavy today for another family in our church that we love dearly.

Tomorrow we will attend the memorial service of a newborn baby who never took a breath in this life. Her parents and three big brothers have slowed down to mourn the fact that she will never come home to see the nursery prepared for her. She will never try on any of the cute baby clothes received at her baby shower. She will miss so much that was planned for her.

But what she has far outweighs what she’s missed.

Consider this: She took her first breath in Heaven. She was embraced from the womb by her Savior. Her life will impact hundreds who hear the testimony of how God has helped her parents face the tragedy many parents fear. God’s faithfulness will be on display at the memorial service tomorrow in a way many will find perplexing.

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Her name is Esther Grace. Her parents believe she was born for such a time as this, like the story of Esther in the Bible. If you don’t know the story, I encourage you to read it. She faced the plan marked out for her, not knowing if God would give her life or death. This is true faith on display and it brings great glory to our Heavenly Father who deserves such praise.

The service is at 2p. tomorrow. Won’t you pray for this dear family that they would sense God’s nearness in their dark night of the soul.

The good news is the fact that there is great joy in Heaven today. Let this fact fuel our resolve to press on towards the mark, for we know that we do not run in vain.

What things are you facing today that requires such faith? How can I pray for you?

Thinking For Myself

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Family Photo 2013

Family Photo 2013

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve started to post but just couldn’t do it. I wasn’t ready.  The last time I wrote here my Mom was alive, and I was busy taking notes. She passed from this life into the arms of her Savior on December 15th. I have been busy mourning, sorting, filing, crying, remembering, grieving, praying, and cherishing. But thankfully, there has been no regret – NONE!

During her last few weeks she was visited by lots of family members who had read my book. She was thrilled to hear them wanting to know more of our family’s history. You see, Mom spent most of her adult life researching our genealogy. I have boxes to prove her work began long before computers were around. She was passionate to find out the answers to questions which only led to more questions as her research deepened. Sadly, many questions will never be answered. I’m thankful for the stories we do know, and that’s thanks to Mom’s hard work.

I’ll never forget walking into Mom’s room having just remembered someone we needed to call to let them know of her prognosis. Before I could say a word she said, “Debi, you need to call so and so!”  We always did that – she called it reading each other’s minds. 🙂 It would usually make us laugh, but not this time.

I started to cry and said, “Mom, what am I going to do without you?”

She answered in her matter-of-fact tone, “Think for yourself, that’s what!”

So here I am, a little over five weeks since I saw her last, and I’m having to think on my own. She can’t remind me to do this or find out about that. I’m still paying her bills until we can close up her estate, but it’s not the same. I used to do it for her. Now I’m doing because it has to be done until we’re finished. And if I have a question, I can’t call her and ask.

I gave Mom the first copy of my book on September, 26, 2012. Two weeks before she died I had the thought that this book would soon be mine, so I asked her to sign the inside cover for me. I’m so glad she did. What did she write? It was nothing fancy, but it means to world to me.

She wrote with her weakened grip, “I love you, Mom!”

I love you, too, Mom. I think I’m finally ready to stand up and think for myself, but I’ll always miss you.

Mom's Book inside cover

 

Taking Notes

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My Beautiful Mom

My Beautiful Mom

In case you are wondering where I’ve been the past couple of weeks – my mom has terminal cancer. We found out a week and a half ago, and life hasn’t been the same since.

My days are spent at her house with my sister and brother caring for her every need. We sit and talk while she listens because talking wears her out. Sometimes she chimes in and shares a story I know I don’t want to forget. If you recall in my book I’ve mentioned my mom saying,

“Every time someone dies a library of information dies with them, unless some one takes the time to write their story down.”

This is why I’m taking notes…lots of notes. I don’t want to forget these precious stories. She helped me research Through The Eyes of Grace. What a blessing it was to take three separate trips with her to Oklahoma over the past decade. We made memories I will cherish for the rest of my life. Writing my next book will be easier because I know how the process works, but it will be harder because I won’t have her to help me. God help me face the future with faith, not fear.

We’ve been blessed to have family near and far come to visit. She is deeply loved by all who know her. Most days she doesn’t remember her diagnosis and is hopeful she’ll soon be well. But barring a miracle, we realize her days with us are few.

We are sad.

We cry a lot.

We hug a lot.

And we pray a lot.

I just wanted to take a moment for you to know why I’ve been silent–I’m busy taking notes.