A Rut Can Be A Good Thing

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I have always loved maps. Maps help you see where you are from a different perspective, and they help you get to where you want to go. Traveling without a map would be unheard of, unless you are familiar with the layout of the land.

In Grace’s day, maps weren’t readily available to the common traveler. Instead, they followed ruts in the ground using a compass to make sure they were heading in the right direction. The ruts were well-worn paths that were a good thing. It showed many people had traveled that way and they most-likely led to the next town.

The map above shows what Oklahoma territory looked like in 1905.

You can see Noble County, where Ceres (pronounced like the store–Sears) is located, as well as the Creek Nation, where Jenks is located (marked with a yellow arrow). Both towns are where my book takes place. How Grace would have loved to have had a map like this when she discovered she would be leaving everything that was familiar to her in Oklahoma Territory for her new life in Indian Territory. But she didn’t. She had to rely on the advice of those who had traveled that way before, and it was frightening.

How often we are forced to depend on the advice of those who have gone before us as we face a new normal. The Bible provides an excellent map for Christians to follow day in and day out, and the wisdom there is not a well-worn path, but a proven guide that is not limited by the time in which it was written. Maps expire. GPS systems are practically obsolete from the moment an update is finished. Time marches on and marks are made along the way. Only those who are looking for guidance find the help they need.

What are the well-worn paths in your life that you can’t do without? What paths would be best to leave behind to pursue a new way?

 

 

Have You Heard of Goodreads?

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goodreads_f

Have you heard of Goodreads? It’s a site dedicated to helping those who love to read connect with others who love to read. You can keep a running library of books you’ve read, books you want to read, and books you’re currently reading. It’s basically a social network for the literary-minded, and I love it!

When my book was published I added it to my library of books read. Imagine my delight when people started posting their thoughts on Through The Eyes Of Grace? Following is the first review I received from someone I don’t know. Her words are a huge encouragement to me, and I pray that more will come to find my book as a result of her review:

This is a novel based on the life of the author’s grandmother, Grace Kirwin. In 1904, Grace, Age 15, lived in Oklahoma Territory with her parents and siblings. The action begins almost immediately with a traumatic experience for Grace in chapter 1. Written in first-person point of view, we travel with Grace through her parents attempts to do what they think is best for her, her reactions to their choices, and her move to Indian Territory to live with a cousin and begin a new life. Nightmares and memories follow Grace, sometimes causing her to pull away from people. With the love of family and a special gentlemen, Grace successfully begins her new life.

This is an uplifing story and does not dwell on negative aspects of the events. Historical facts are plentiful and expertly woven into the context.

The book contains old family photos of the people in the story. Coupled with the excellent writing, this story comes to life on the page.

If you are already on Goodreads, won’t you share with us your thoughts about the site? What do you love about it? How has it helped you meet your reading goals?

Thinking For Myself

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Family Photo 2013

Family Photo 2013

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve started to post but just couldn’t do it. I wasn’t ready.  The last time I wrote here my Mom was alive, and I was busy taking notes. She passed from this life into the arms of her Savior on December 15th. I have been busy mourning, sorting, filing, crying, remembering, grieving, praying, and cherishing. But thankfully, there has been no regret – NONE!

During her last few weeks she was visited by lots of family members who had read my book. She was thrilled to hear them wanting to know more of our family’s history. You see, Mom spent most of her adult life researching our genealogy. I have boxes to prove her work began long before computers were around. She was passionate to find out the answers to questions which only led to more questions as her research deepened. Sadly, many questions will never be answered. I’m thankful for the stories we do know, and that’s thanks to Mom’s hard work.

I’ll never forget walking into Mom’s room having just remembered someone we needed to call to let them know of her prognosis. Before I could say a word she said, “Debi, you need to call so and so!”  We always did that – she called it reading each other’s minds. 🙂 It would usually make us laugh, but not this time.

I started to cry and said, “Mom, what am I going to do without you?”

She answered in her matter-of-fact tone, “Think for yourself, that’s what!”

So here I am, a little over five weeks since I saw her last, and I’m having to think on my own. She can’t remind me to do this or find out about that. I’m still paying her bills until we can close up her estate, but it’s not the same. I used to do it for her. Now I’m doing because it has to be done until we’re finished. And if I have a question, I can’t call her and ask.

I gave Mom the first copy of my book on September, 26, 2012. Two weeks before she died I had the thought that this book would soon be mine, so I asked her to sign the inside cover for me. I’m so glad she did. What did she write? It was nothing fancy, but it means to world to me.

She wrote with her weakened grip, “I love you, Mom!”

I love you, too, Mom. I think I’m finally ready to stand up and think for myself, but I’ll always miss you.

Mom's Book inside cover

 

Taking Notes

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My Beautiful Mom

My Beautiful Mom

In case you are wondering where I’ve been the past couple of weeks – my mom has terminal cancer. We found out a week and a half ago, and life hasn’t been the same since.

My days are spent at her house with my sister and brother caring for her every need. We sit and talk while she listens because talking wears her out. Sometimes she chimes in and shares a story I know I don’t want to forget. If you recall in my book I’ve mentioned my mom saying,

“Every time someone dies a library of information dies with them, unless some one takes the time to write their story down.”

This is why I’m taking notes…lots of notes. I don’t want to forget these precious stories. She helped me research Through The Eyes of Grace. What a blessing it was to take three separate trips with her to Oklahoma over the past decade. We made memories I will cherish for the rest of my life. Writing my next book will be easier because I know how the process works, but it will be harder because I won’t have her to help me. God help me face the future with faith, not fear.

We’ve been blessed to have family near and far come to visit. She is deeply loved by all who know her. Most days she doesn’t remember her diagnosis and is hopeful she’ll soon be well. But barring a miracle, we realize her days with us are few.

We are sad.

We cry a lot.

We hug a lot.

And we pray a lot.

I just wanted to take a moment for you to know why I’ve been silent–I’m busy taking notes.

We’ve Always Done It That Way

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I was visiting my mom today. 🙂 We were talking about strange traditions, and I remembered a story I once heard. It went something like this:

One day a Mother was showing her daughter how to make roast beef. As she prepared the meat she cut it in half and placed it in the roasting pan. The daughter asked her why she cut the roast in half, to which she replied, “I don’t know. This is how my Mama did it.”

The next day the daughter asked her grandmother why she cut her roasts in half before cooking them, to which she replied, “I don’t know. This is how my Mama did it.”

The following day the daughter visited her great-grandmother who was living in a nursing home. She curiously asked why she used to cut her roasts in half before cooking it, to which her great-grandmother replied, “Oh, land sakes, it was because my wood stove was too small for the roast to fit whole. I had to cut it in half to have have enough to feed the family.”

My Mom laughed out loud when I told her this story. How many times are traditions created out of necessity? What starts out as a need quickly becomes a preference handed down from generation to generation.

Do you have any traditions that seem strange to you? Have you ever asked how they originated? You may be surprised to hear the story. You never know until you A.S.K.

I Promise…

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Promoting a book can feel a lot like campaigning for political office. You have to talk about why you did what you did, why you want others to listen to you tell about it and hopefully, get your listeners to buy your product. It is awkward at times as self-promotion should be! Politicians, if they’re honest and have integrity, don’t want you to vote for them because you like them, they want you to vote for them because they truly believe their plan will be best for the office they’re seeking.

In the same way, I want people to buy my book not so the numbers will grow and I’ll be more popular. No, I want you to read my book because I believe my grandmother’s story is worth knowing. She was an amazing woman, and her life offers lessons for us all. If you’ve already purchased a copy of Through The Eyes Of Grace and read it, I want to say a huge Thank You!  Words cannot adequately express how grateful I am. Would you do a couple of things for me? First, tell your friends and family about it and share it on your Facebook page and/or Twitter account? Second, would you consider writing a review on Amazon for me? Reviews help other readers who know nothing of me or my book decide whether or not it is something they are interested in reading.

I’m grateful we no longer have to listen to the constant campaigning of the politicians promising us things they may or may not be able to accomplish. I pray my posts never feel like an empty campaign promise. Thanks for stopping by.

New Memories and Fresh Mercy

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Tom took me away for the month of October to see something I’ve never been able to see before…we watched the leaves turn from dark green to various hues of red, orange and yellow in the mountains of North Georgia. It was a magnificent display of God’s glory in creation.

While we were there we had two full moons, a meteor shower, a visit from hundreds of ladybugs who swarm this time of year, visits from family a friends for a few days here and there, visits from all kinds of birds including a brown hawk who swooped on our deck, great food, lively farmers markets, crowded flea markets, three winery tours, cool picnics and  a hikes to a waterfall and mountain peaks and the outer remnants of a massive storm, Sandy. It was a perfect time away where we marveled at the gift God has given us in each other and in Himself.

The changing seasons are always refreshing when they first arrive, aren’t they? We long for the cooler temps of fall after a long, hot summer. We pray for snow in December to make our Christmas feel more Christmassy. We watch for the first buds of spring telling us the winter has passed at last. And then, when Memorial Day arrives we celebrate the time for barbecues and pool parties. But in the middle of a season it is easy to grow discontent. We no longer appreciate the newness of the season, but long for what we don’t have.

Let’s ask God to help us be grateful for our current season of life. He wants us to discover new mercies each day, not just when passing from one season to the next.

In what ways is God helping you appreciate TODAY?

 

From My Journal

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From time to time, I’m going to share with you some of my personal journey as I record in my journal. My hope is that this will help you as God is helping me, and that it might encourage you to start journaling your own thoughts and prayers.

Journal entry from October 15th:

My Bible verse for today is Deuteronomy 7:7-8 ESV:

“It was not because you were more in number than any other people that the Lord set His love on you, but it is because the Lord loves you and is keeping the oath that He swore to your fathers.”

Thank you, Father, for Your faithfulness to keep Your promises. You promise and You never forget. We benefit from the promise You made to Abraham thousands of years ago. I’m sure I’m benefitting from promises You  made to my grandmother–Grace Stella–and my great-grandfather–“Uncle Bud” Oswalt. Thank You.

Thank You for choosing to place Your love on me and on my children. I believe and pray my grandchildren will grow to love You as well. Set Your seal upon their heart, Lord. May they learn of Your grace at an early age. I love You and can’t imagine my life apart from Your love. Thank You that I will never know.

___________________________________________

Do you keep a journal? If so, what is God currently saying to you? If not, have you considered the blessing this would be for your family in the years to come?

All I Can Say Is…Wow!

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Stella Grace at 4 months

This week I am more and more aware of God’s kindness to have brought me this far in the writing process. I have heard from dozens of people as they’ve read Through The Eyes Of Grace, and it brings tears to my eyes. Grace’s story is affecting others for good. I have heard moms tell me they are going to have their daughters read my book in hopes of inspiring them to know their own grandparent’s stories. I have had people stop me to tell me their story of regret towards their parents or grandparents who are no longer around to ask. I have even had some tell me of their dream to write a similar story to honor their family legacy.

All I can say is, Wow!

God is taking my little mite and using it for His purposes. If you’ve read my book and found it enjoyable, would you take time to write a review on Amazon about it for me? Your words will help others decide if they would enjoy it as well.

I must say that what I love most is hearing from you. Your words of encouragement are washing away years of disbelief that I could ever accomplish such a feat. Now that I have, the temptation is even greater to discount my work, which I’m sure saddens the Lord who is the One who enabled me to do it in the first place. I want to be quick to give Him the glory for the big picture story of His grace that He weaves into each of our lives.

How has your family impacted your appreciation of God’s grace at work in you?

Big Mama’s Chili

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I’ll never forget the time 34 years ago when I was making plans to go visit my fiance’, Tom, for the weekend. He lived 2 1/2 hours away before cell phones or e-mail. We relied on land line phone calls to communicate with each other and it wasn’t cheap. We also wrote letters–lots of letters to each other.

As I was packing, my grandmother whom we affectionately called Big Mama, let me know she was making Tom her homemade chili. She wanted to make sure I didn’t forget to take a quart to him. Somehow in the four months Tom and I had been dating he managed to win her heart. She loved Tom, and she showed her affection for him by doing what she did best–cooking for him.

We didn’t know then that it would be our last Fall with her for she died the following June, only four months after our wedding.

Tonight I made Big Mama’s Chili for the first time this Fall.

It was delicious as usual. Somehow having her story, Through The Eyes Of Grace, read by friends, family and those whom I’ve never met makes this year’s chili even more special. I loved her chili then, and I still do, but I love the heart she had for Tom and me even more. Our love is richer because of her blessing. Now I’m the one who shows my affection for Tom by cooking for him, and I’ve loved doing it for 34 years. 🙂

If you would like to try her recipe, you can find it under the Through The Eyes Of Grace tab above. I hope you’ll like it as much as we do.

Do you have special family recipes that have been handed down to you in a special way? Won’t you share the story and the recipe with us?